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Mexican/Puerto Rican Jokes
IQ
HP just announced the HAL10000 computer and is displaying their new prize at the computer show. Anyone who cares to, can walk right up and carry on a conversation with the machine. So the first person steps up and the HAL10000 says, "Good Morning I'm a HAL10000 computer, if you will tell me your IQ, we can have a conversation."
Well, the guy responds, "I have an IQ of 160." So the HAL10000 says, "Very well, let's discuss Einsteinium tensor mechanics in close proximity to a singularity event horizon." And so they did.
Later, another guy walks up and exclaims, "My IQ is 110." So the HAL10000 says, "Very well, let's discuss the working of the internal combustion engine." And so they did.
Finally, this third guy walks up and says, "My IQ is 65." So the HAL10000 replies, "Buenos dias senor."
Mexican One Liners
Why did the Mexicans fight so hard to take the Alamo?
So they could have four clean walls to write on.
Definition of a Mexican wolf:
Hot tamale looking for a frijole.
Why do Mexicans eat beans every day?
So they can take a bubble bath at night.
Why did God give Mexicans noses?
So they'd have something to pick in the off season.
What do you get when you cross a Mexican and an octopus?
Got me, but it sure can pick lettuce.
Why do Mexicans have such small steering wheels?
So they can drive with handcuffs.
Why don't Mexicans barbecue? B
Because the beans keep falling through the grill.
Why do Mexicans have large noses?
So they will have something to pick during the off season.
How can you tell a Mexican cesspool?
It's the one with the diving board.
What is the problem with Mexican cars and Mexican toilets?
Leaking Hoses!
Why do Mexicans drive low riders?
So they can pick lettuce while they drive.
What's the difference between a Jewish girl and a Mexican girl?
The Mexican girl has real orgasms and fake jewelry!
When does a Mexican become Spanish??
When he marries your Daughter............
Puerto Rican One Liners
What do you call a Puerto Rican with no arms?
Trustworthy
Why don't Puerto Ricans have checking accounts?
Because it's hard to sign checks with a spray can.
What do you get when you cross a Puerto Rican and a Chinaman?
A car thief who can't drive.
Why are there no Puerto Rican doctors?
Because you can't write prescriptions with spray paint.
How many people does it take to bury a Puerto Rican?
Five. One to lower the Puerto Rican, and four to lower the radio.
Do you know how to starve a Puerto Rican to death?
Hide his food stamps under his work shoes.
What name does a Hispanic fireman give his second son?
Hose "B"
How do save a drowning Colombian
Throw him an anchor
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